Monday, July 13, 2009

Monday Mischief: A Big Hug and Kiss

I promise to resume my normal blogging tomorrow and cease with the spilling-of-my-guts! But, today I just wanted to send out a big hug and kiss to all of my friends and readers who did not take my "fishing" for feedback as a sign of weakness, but rather took it as an opportunity to share our experiences as bloggers and fellow humans -- both the pitfalls and the fulfilling bits! I am feeling very at peace today about the whole thing, and feel much more connected and in-tune with my readers and fellow bloggers.

xoxo

I rarely allow myself to indulge or pay attention to negative emotions relating to my blog [it's supposed to be fun, right?]. But, what I found is that with the freedom and creativity that blogging brings you, a certain sense of ownership and dedication follows. It is this sense of passion and ownership that is often not translated to those outside of the blog-world. What results can often be a feeling of alienation or a sense that other people around us don't care or understand what an important part of our lives blogging is -- we work hard to create, research, organize, compile, collect, think, ponder, search, and explore -- but for those who do not read or write blogs, this does not necessarily come across or make sense. I have had so much excellent, productive feedback over the past few days, and I just wanted to share some suggestions people have given for how to deal with this issue of our blog-lives not interacting harmoniously with our real-lives:
  • Other folks talk about their lives, their interests, and their work, so when people ask about us about ourselves, we should talk about what we have been working on, blog included [seems obvious, right?].
  • When we write something that we think someone we know might find interesting, instead of waiting for them to read it on the blog and give feedback [which I've learned lots of people hate to do], e-mail them the link -- this makes it feel more personal anyway.
  • Just try to remember that for every one person who leaves a comment, there are probably a hundred who do not...but that doesn't mean there aren't people out there who didn't get something meaningful from a post.
  • Learn to appreciate the anonymity that blogging can provide -- it is a platform to share another part of ourselves that we might keep hidden away otherwise; this can be very cathartic and fulfilling.
  • Or on the other hand, just tell friends and family how important your blog is to you! They might not realize it unless you explain it. If you are kind enough to ask them about their jobs, their child, their hobby, their work, then they should be polite enough to ask about or check in on your blog every now and again!
  • Remember why you started your blog to begin with -- was it for personal fulfillment? To create a new community? Sometimes we just have to remember that not everyone in our lives can be there for us in every way...different people fulfill different needs, and just because they don't "get" what you blog about doesn't mean they don't love you!
  • Reach out to people [I'm so happy that I did]. This can actually draw you closer -- sharing your feelings and your anxieties makes you more human and creates a sense of intimacy. You discover that other people deal with many of the same issues and difficulties...and it makes you feel less alienated.
  • Follow the "do unto others" motto: the more you share, comment, conversate, show interest, and give feedback to others [both in blogging and in life], the more you will receive.
  • Lastly, remember that your blog is not "you." This constructed identity [no matter how honest we are on our blogs] is not the real YOU. It is only one fragment of us and our complexities as people. Do not allow the constructed "you" to stand in or represent your true self.
Well loves, here's to many more years of blogging to come...